You’re over at your friend’s place, catching up with a glass of wine. It’s all easy and relaxed like the friends you are, then without warning, the friend launches into psychic mode, giving a reading you didn’t ask for. If you had this happen and you felt a little awkward, you’re not the only one. 

One minute it’s all fun and selfies, next minute you’re having a reading. What happened?

You just got yourself an unsolicited psychic reading. And yes it can feel a bit weird.

You’re being courteous and listen but really, in the back of your mind, you’re thinking, how you can politely get out of it. And now it just feels weird.

Don’t to be that person

There’s a certain big-haired psychic from New York whose TV show is all about accosting people in the street with un-asked for readings. The show loves to capture the stunned faces of the recipients, as she drops her non-consensual psychic nuggets and runs. It might work for reality shows but in real life?

Not so much.

Back to you and your glass of wine. You didn’t ask for the reading. All you wanted was quality time with your friend. Then the energy shifts.

You’ve gone off true north.

Like a compass swinging off true north, the chardonnay catch-up shifted course, and maybe you want to want to steer it back. The dynamic shifts from the easy equal energy of friends catching up, to different roles.

 An unsolicited reading changes the energy

An unsolicited reading tips the power to one side. There’s an implication one person knows more than the other.

It becomes an “I know more than you and you know less” dynamic, which is weird when the agreement was to meet for a friendly catch up.  The relationship swings to a reader and sitter or teacher and student type. Or even worse, to the “hit and run” New York TV psychic, it becomes the “crazy psychic lady in the street and person minding their own business” dynamic.

My guilty story

How do I know this?  Because I’ve done it! It only happened once but I still replay it in my head over and over again. Why did I bang on a neighbours door waking his child up to tell him a psychic message?

Because I didn’t know any better at the time.

I was so excited about my newly developed abilities, I had no filter.  I was just too eager to share it with the world. It’s the same reason why people give unsolicited readings. Usually, they’re so excited to share, they forget to check for permission first. It’s coming from a good, loving place, even if it’s a little misdirected.

How to handle it

Is this your friend? Of course you love them and know they mean well. But it’s also time to let them know gently that an unasked for psychic reading might not be appropriate at that time.

Thank them politely and say something like, “hi, thank you so much, I’ll think about it,” then change the subject – FAST.

Know you don’t have to take on the information if you don’t want to. It was unsolicited. Tell them you’ll consider it but change the topic of the conversation. That way you can still continue being friends. Continue to love your friend and know that they are coming from a beautiful place and they are just learning the psychic ropes.

Or, maybe it’s time to rethink the dynamics of your relationship if you feel like your friend is coming from a place of creating drama.

How to avoid giving unsolicited readings

You’re psychic, you want to share – of course. If you are with someone and you DO receive some info relating to them simply check in with your friend first. Tell them you have some insights and ask them if they would like to hear it.

That way the choice is theirs about whether they want to receive the insight or not. It also gives them the chance to prepare. It’s important for the sitter to be in a receptive state.

If they don’t want to hear the insight, give them the option to hear it when they might be ready some other time. They will appreciate you respecting their choice of timing, and you keep your friends.

Want more psychic etiquette?

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Any other reading etiquette question? Hit the comments or shoot me a message, I’d love to write a blog post just for you.